****** POSSIBLE GROSS-OUT ALERT *********

Some snippets from my conversation with Whateley while we were driving home from work (edited for clarity):

Whateley: "Ugh, that poo was so big... well, let's just say, the same amount was out of the water as in it."

Me: "So, it's like you gave birth to a baby..."

Whateley: "No, I gave birth to it's uncle."

Whateley: "I could have kept looking at it longer but the automatic flusher kicked in."

Me: "You have automatic flushers?"

Whateley: "Yeah. Why? Don't you?"

Me: "No, we have regular flushers." (makes hand gesture showing the flushing motion)

Whateley: "Well, it was that way back in SoCal. And I wish we had automatic ones."

Me: "What? People would actually not flush after going?"

Whateley: "Well, men can't give birth. When we produce poo, it's like we're proud of it."

Me: "That is so gross. Wow, I can't believe they took that into consideration for the men's room here. Is that so for all of the men's rooms?"

Whateley: "Yep, all three of them."

Me: "Wow."

Whateley: "Y'know how many women's restroom are there? Two."

Me: "Really?"

Whateley: "Yeah, I think our building used to be owned by Apple, and it looks like an executive bathroom. It's got a lock, even, though it's not turn on. But it's much nicer."

Whateley: "I know it may be sexist or something, but I think that's okay cuz there's way more men than women."

Me: "Oh, I agree. I mean, it's not like we have to worry about waiting in line in the bathroom."

Whateley: "But y'know, I was really proud of that poo."

Me: (groans) "So, why are we still talking about this?"

Whateley: "I love you."

Me: "Why else would I be listening to you talk about your poo."

And... scene.