I applied for a passport today. It expired five years ago, but my Dad said that they were going to raise rates come April 1st. The lady at the post office said that the rates were raised in early March. But in six to ten weeks, I can skip out of the country whenever I want. Hah!

I watched "13 Going on 30" and it's a cute movie. I tried forever to access the deleted scenes and other features and the realized that it's probably a bootleg copy and therefore didn't have it, though it did have the commentaries and the making-of video.

Sigh. I feel a little lethargic.

Celebrity serving for today: Sarah Jessica Parker.

She came in before, and I recognized her voice, but she was wearing huge sunglasses. The thing was, it was six in the morning, so it was a little conspicuous. Eh. And celebrities have to wait in line just like everyone else.

Alright, off to do homework. Or eat. Or watch TV while I do either.

Cannot get the momentum started....

More later.

So in our projects class today, my teacher told us that unfortunately, due to the busy schedules of the actual artistic directors, in a place like EA where they don't focus on animation or visual effects as their main thing, the hiring process has a "filter" of non-artistic HR managers who have no idea what their company does... artistically, I mean. So what they are looking for is eye candy, which my teacher then said just proved the point that in order to get any notice in this industry, you need both eye candy AND the montage of skills. So... unfortunately, that means that I will have to wait until the end of this year to have the eye candy portion. Sigh.

As for that whole "work visa" thing, I don't know if companies ever do conduct "fake interviews" but the school Internship Coordinator did tell me that there was a really talented guy from Sweden who was all set to work for Sony Imageworks but couldn't cuz he had to go back to Sweden since he was no longer a student. Supposedly, it's too much work to go through the trouble of "pretending to look" for an American since they can just as easily hire an American for those low-totem-pole positions.

Anyway, things have been hard, life has been difficult, and honestly, sometimes I feel like throwing in the towel. More than anything, I would love to just crawl into bed and sleep forever. Sigh. Even the happiest things in my life are tainted by sadness. I don't really want to explain, except that if any of you are spiritually inclined, please pray for me, for my relationships with friends and family, my school and career goals, and for the state of my very soul and its desire to seek out God.


On a side note, my beautiful car has already 670+ miles on it.... Oh noooooooooooooooooooooooooo....

Yes, Whateley, EA does suck.

So what happened? Well, it turns out that EA doesn't really take animation interns. They rarely hire animators straight out of school. In fact, they are only looking for interns in modelling, texturing, environmental art, and lighting.

BUT... did they tell us that? Nooooooooooooooo.

Instead, I stayed up all night to make a stupid DVD of my reel that they wouldn't even look at because it wasn't rendered! The guy told me to use non-generic models, texture them, light them, and basically come up with a finished production piece... to showcase my freakin' animation skills. Because, of course, my modelling and texturing abilities determine how well I can animate.

So it sucks that about half the people interviewing were either animators or concept artists (another position that they rarely hire recent grads for), so we all ended up wasting our efforts for this interview! I mean, sure they gave us feedback, but pretty much, the unspoken suggestion was that we instead become modellers or texture artists, and if you can animate too... well, that's just hunky-dory and maybe they'll have a project for you years later... if they haven't fired you by that point.

My biggest beef with them (besides the f-ed up way they evaluate the reels) is that the least they could do was be honest with us. I'd much rather hear, "Well, we rarely hire animation interns unless you're a genius" rather than, "Well, please submit your animation reels and by the way, we don't really have animation interns, but we don't want to discourage you."

Full production pieces.... I swear. EA's got the rep (that most game companies have anyway) that they just work you to death and spit you out, so I didn't really want to work for them anyway. But I really wanted to have the learning opportunity, or at least the professional experience on my resume, and it looks like I won't be able to really try for it until I finish my final project in December.

So yes, EA sucks.

So according to some people at church, the price we ended up paying for the car was... well, reasonable. So perhaps we didn't get ripped off... more like just missed an opportunity for a deal. Oh well.

Interview for an interview with EA tomorrow! I better visit all the doctors I need to just in case I have to put in a leave of absence at work. Just signed up for the Stock Investment Plan. Dude, if I had signed up the first chance I coulda last year, those stocks would be worth double now. Dang.

So Tivo cut out the last five seconds of the Episode III trailer from "The O.C." so I'm trying to download it right now. Well, more like I'm trying to download a bit torrent of what someone who Tivo'ed then digitized it. But the d/l is taking forever.

As for my car, overall, what's done is done and for the most part I'm very happy with it. And yes, it's like the most stolen car in America. And it's the most stolen color in America. Which most likely just means that it's the most popular car with the most popular color. Unique.

Okay, off for more animation.

Awww... comments! (sheds a tear of joy)

Of course, it was so nice of you to talk about my various bodily emissions. Huzzah.

So for the serious question, the reason why I think my parents got ripped off on my car is that they paid about list price for it, which is what the dealers used to begin their bargaining. So if they had negotiated, then they most likely coulda gotten it for $500 to $2000 cheaper. Well, that's what my brother says, anyway.

[o][o][o][o][o][o][o][o][o][o][o][o][o][o]

I slept all day, I've been procrastinating the rest, and I have to be at work in 5 hours and I haven't done any more animations. Argh!

Before I go on, I want to give a special shout-out to Bleusky cuz it's her birthday tomorrow. Happy Birthday! (Hey, she's the only one that comments regularly, so if you did, too, I would give a shout-out to you, too!)

So how am I today? In a word? Cruddy. I've been battling a fever, cough, headache, and runny nose the past two days. Fortunately, I didn't have to work today. But I had to use up 8 hours of vacation time today just to make sure I got enough hours to keep my benefits.

As I'm writing this, I'm scanning a huge stack of animation drawings so I can put it in my reel. I'm on drawing #171. It's a little under half way. Of course, I still have to tweak 'em a little in Photoshop. Ugh. But this is all for the best. There's an internship opportunity at EA at stake here. (EA being Electronic Arts)

Last Thursday night, I went to an event thrown by Alias at The House of Moves. Now, what do you think this was? A couple that was sitting at our table thought that it meant it was some sort of party thrown by the people of the TV show "Alias." (She was wondering where Jennifer Gardner was.) So they were obviously lost when the presentation was for how Alias' Maya 3D program can be used in video game development. The House of Moves wasn't a club (though it would be a cool name for one) but a motion-capture studio. Anyway, it was a good event, didn't win anything, but there was an open bar and free In-N-Out hamburgers. Suffice it to say, I took full advantage of the open bar. This schmoozing stuff is hard work. ;)

So before I go on, my classes this semester will be:

3D Texturing, Lighting & Rendering
Color Theory
3D Animation Project 1

I dropped the Digital 2D Animation Production class because the class was... frustrating. The only people that could animate was me and this other girl who dropped it after the first week. It was too hodge-podge of a class. I mean, if you want to learn Flash, or storyboarding, then you should take those classes. Basically, I would've had to come up with a project for this class, and with my final project starting this semester, as well as the Animation Club, I figured it was just unneccesary headache that would not help me in the long run. But I did learn that the multi-feed scanner would not help me in this case, so therefore I will have to individually scan each drawing... as I'm doing now. (I'm on #191 right now, as I type.)

I'm feeling cruddy again, I think it's time I got drugged up.

Uh... uh... uh....

So I got a new car yesterday. Or more precisely, my parents bought me a new car yesterday. My car, having died last weekend, has forced me to abuse the generosity of my roommate and wake him up at 4:45 in the morning to drive me to work. Anyway, my mom talked about how I should get a new car, and since I can't afford to buy one myself, they'll pay for half the down payment and the monthly payments (and insurance, etc). Now... I feel rather guilty. They don't have money. Period. It's only cuz we had that land deal recently that this is even an option. I'm just worried that I'll have a new car and my parents won't be able to pay the mortgage and the bank will foreclose. Eh.

And the worst of it is, even though the car salesman is a relative (he's the grandson of my grandfather's older sister), I think he ripped us off. He used all the classic sleazy salesman techniques, and my parents fell for it hook, line, and sinker. They can't conceive of the idea that other Koreans (or even relatives) will screw you. My father even said to me that since he's going to get ripped off anyway, he might as well let a relative do it.

Siiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiigh.

I have to remind myself that they are adults, they have their own minds, and if they refuse our advice, then there's nothing more we can do. And since they are paying for my car, I just have to let them do stupid things.

I guess that's why even though the car is great (no, it's bee-yoo-tee-full!), it's hard to get excited about something that was obtained under not-so-smart situations.

It's one of those times where I have to trust in God that everything's under His control. But honestly, I don't know if we were brought into this world to save my parents from themselves.

Anyway, depressing issues aside, the new car really is beautiful. I've never had a new car before, and it was so weird to see the odometer read "18" when I drove off the lot. (And I tripled the mileage in one day! Oh no!) It's a new 2005 Honda Civic LX sedan, and it's the no-frills model, but dagnabit, it's got a radio! And a CD player! And cup-holders! And the windshield wipers actually wipe the windshield! And it's so cleeeeeeeeeeean!

Okay, so maybe you'll get an idea of what my last car was like.