So yes, you can now call me... "Mrs. the Gnome."

This past weekend was a blur and definitely too short.

To recap, on Friday we went to pick up the gnome's tux (and he wouldn't let me see him in it, though if I had, then maybe I would've told him he needed to get a smaller size since all that working out shrank him a bit), got two gigantic bobas, and drove on to Las Vegas. We had sent out our itineraries to all our guests, so we had to stick to it for the most part. After we checked in, we went to the Marriage License Bureau (which is its own building with around 10 windows, all of them busy when we arrived!) and got our marriage license, and then headed to Harrah's for buffet dinner with Bleusky and our roommates. Harrahs is a pretty good buffet, but we went there for lunch last time, so we didn't realize that their dinners were rather expensive. Overpriced, was our opinion. We then hung out our suite (with a jacuzzi!) with Bleusky's traveling companions, our roommates, and some bottles of hard apple cider. Mmmm....

Of course, this being the night before our wedding, we were very chaste... well, "chaste"... oh who are we kidding. But what were we going to do, get separate rooms for the night?

Saturday morning was hectic. We decided to stay at the Luxor for the most part and had breakfast buffet there, joined by my family. It was Whateley's stepmother's idea that we have a "family breakfast" on the morning of the wedding, but they ended up walking around and eating at the MGM. Which, if you think about it, is just a crosswalk and a tram stop away from Luxor, so I don't know why they couldn't just go a little farther. Whateley has theories but I won't list them here. I had to cut out of the breakfast early so I could make it to my hair/make-up appointment. I looked bee-yoo-tee-fool. But it's one of those, well-I-better-for-all-the-money-I-spent-on-it-deals. To put into perspective, the cost of hair and make-up (including tip) was three times what I spent on the dress.

BTW, a note about my dress. I looked damn hot. It was a beautiful dress, with a full skirt and flower detailing, and it was a prom dress. Not only that, I got it at an outlet store, so it was last year's prom dress. (Which might explain why it didn't sell since it looked too much like a wedding dress.) Anyway, the cost of the dress is less than the cost of a rental.

The wedding ceremony was short. REALLY short. There's a reason why I told people to come early, cuz truly it would be one of those blink-and-you'll-miss-it ceremonies. If I had known about the photo package upsell (more on that later) then I wouldn't have upgraded the photos and I would've upgraded the length of the chapel time. Oh well.

Afterwards, we milled around, took pictures, and pretty much everyone headed for the reception while I went back to Bleusky's room to take off my borrowed contacts. Yes, borrowed contacts. Well, it's been years since I've worn contacts, and the soft ones I had had been sitting in the same solution for 3 or 4 years. I was prepared to walk down the aisle with fuzzy vision when Bleusky's friend checked my glasses and said that hers was similar. And darned if they weren't. I was able to see and only get slightly nauseous by the time I took them off. Of course, being nervous about the wedding didn't help.

I tried not to stress out. Weddings can be stressfull enough on their own, so I really tried to keep things simple by having it in Vegas. But I really should've taken my family's lateness into account. They arrived literally five minutes before we had to assemble to walk. And my parents had the flowers. Ugh. And then when my mom got there, the bouquet my aunt made was smaller than the one from Luxor. So I ended up using the one from Luxor. And my dad sat down. Sigh. He's done it once before. We had to call him out to make sure he could walk me down the aisle. What can I say? I looked hot, I was all ready, and I was pacing like mad in the room. It was overwhelming.

I almost broke down during the ceremony, but kept my cool. They hadn't asked us what kind of ceremony we wanted, so they went with the default, which is a civil one. I would've like a slightly more religious one... but it was still nice. So that's the lesson here, I guess. You gotta tell them what you want, and not wait for them to ask.

But we had a good minister. Whateley and I watched some webcam broadcasts of random Vegas weddings, and there were boring ones and obnoxious ones, and ours was very well-spoken and nice.

And our reception totally pwned. The food was really good (too bad I didn't get to finish my plate before the ninja waiters took it away... really, both Bleusky and the bestman were on the watch to make sure this didn't happen), there was plenty of margaritas, and even though there were little snags, all in all, it was great. And our cake rocked. Mmm mmm. Marble with bavarian creme. Mmmmm. We had the leftovers over the next two nights.

That night, I changed into a tank top that looked like my dress, wore the garter over my jeans, kept my veil on, and we went to Quark's Bar at the Star Trek experience at the Hilton. A Klingon woman came by. She was cool. We had 1.5 Borg Spheres. That's a total of 15 shots of alcohol. Between the two of us. It was a fun night. I hope my relatives did too.

Speaking of, dang Koreans and their never-RSVP-ness! We expected 46, when we arrived at the restaurant, there was no table for us! There was a six-seat table meant for the bridal party, and I guess the coordinator didn't bother to tell them that. But... you would think that the people there would think... now where's the bride and groom gonna sit?

Anyway, the total number actually ended up being 50 because a few of my relatives that I didn't expect showed up. When we arrived, we had to kick Whateley's family off the six-seat table and they ended up splitting up and scattering. They had to bring in more chairs, and the only reason 50 people could fit was that Whateley's siblings left early and two of our guests came really really late. Sigh. They say you gotta plan for this... but with it being Vegas and all, I figured they would tell somebody they were coming so that they could coordinate hanging out and hotels and such. Either that, or no one bothered to tell me! I really should've put someone in charge of keeping track of my relatives and put someone else in charge of making sure all the other details got taken care of (like seating for us and such). As it was, I didn't even know that they had a guitarist to come and sing for us. Which was nice. My great-aunt loved singing along with "La Bamba." I can see now why people hire wedding coordinators. Besides arranging the wedding, it's nice to have someone who's official job is to make sure things flow smoothly. But the whole point of a cheap Vegas wedding is no wedding coordinator!

Whateley and I didn't get to relax until we finally went to the Trek bar. He also said that he's glad I won't be stressing out about the wedding anymore. What can I say? I didn't like having to keep track of everything. Whateley didn't understand why I'd get so stressed. But there's a reason why the term "bride-zilla" was coined. Anyway, I was lucky in that there was very little planning involved. But it was a bitch dealing with invitations, RSVPs, confirming details, keeping track of gifts, etc. And I really forgot what a bitch it was dealing with the timeliness of 48 other people, including my habitually-late family.

The next morning, we had brunch at the Flamingo, and it ended up being with a couple of friends who were staying there and Whateley's relatives from Minnesota. We had a good time, and I ate a lot of lox. Mmmmmmmmmmm. We stayed so late that we forgot we had an appointment to look at photos at the chapel. We went there, apologized profusely, and then scheduled an appointment for the next day.

Afterwards, we returned Whateley's tux (there's a Men's Wearhouse there), looked through an EB Games, and then went to take a nap.

We saw Blue Man Group that night, and it was a really good show! Odd, eclectic, and really hard to describe. It's part comedy, part rock and techno, and part performance art. And it's really, really smart.

On Monday, we made sure we made it to the photo meeting at the chapel. More on that later. Then we had Luxor buffet (2-for-1 deal for our suite package), then we wandered around the Strip. We always could never make it past Treasure Island, so this time we parked at the Flamingo and walked north from there. There was a fancy mall we wandered around in, and we even went in search of boba. There was one tea place that had them but ran out. I don't think boba is popular in Vegas, which is weird considering all their Asian visitors. We wandered around the Wynn... and that's a really fancy hotel. Gorgeous. Perhaps a bit too fancy. They have cool sinks. It's actually one big sink (think tilted slab of stone).

BTW, we ended each night with a soak in the jacuzzi of our suite. That was so nice.

We finally checked out Tuesday morning, and we ate at the buffet at Caesar's. It was a bit pricey and there wasn't much selection (they didn't have the massive buffets of the newer hotels), but the food they did have was really good. I had two pieces of hanging skirt steak. I'm not even sure what that is, but it was good.

We got back in good time and dropped off our photos at Costco. (We had a bunch of disposable cameras at each table at the reception.) There was a photo that involved me, a fancy Wynn urinal, and... well, me pretending to be one of those Asian men (who don't just open their fly... if you catch my drift) and that photo was on the top of the pile. I don't think it was suppose to be there. Well... I'm married now, so I guess if the Costco picture guy wants to take a look... well... it's Whateley's problem, not mine. And I'm guessing he doesn't have a problem.

Yeah... we are so made for each other. He suggest something crazy that involves photographic evidence, and I just agree to do it. They don't make that into movies.

The next day, we went over to Whateley's step-grandmother's house and showed her pictures and the video. The video ended with a commercial for the photographers that was as long as the ceremony. I'll be editing that out.

Regarding the photos, we found out why the wedding package was so cheap. For one thing, all the pictures were taken digitally. And secondly, we didn't own the rights to them.

Sucks.

So if we wanted the original digital files, we had to buy the CD, which is basically the rights. And that was pricey. They tried to squeeze us for as much as they could (and gave us a discount on stuff if we'd just purchase other things... let's just say that the total price of the photos was more than the wedding package... which if I had known, I wouldn't have ordered the enlargments to begin with). Anyway, we bought the CD and I'll be Photoshop-ing like crazy to make Whateley not whine about his looks, and they tried to sell us a bad i-Tunes slideshow, and we declined. I think we're going to digitize the video of our ceremony, make a slideshow, and create a way better DVD of our wedding.

Anyway, that means that if you guys would like one of those official photos, we can totally... e-mail you the file and you can make your own damn print.

Okay, so that's my wedding weekend recap. Long entry, I know, but please feel free to add your own comments and share your experiences. And at least acknowledge that 1) the Borg Sphere is one yummy drink, and 2) I looked damn hot that day.